As we grow up, we are told what to do and what not to do. We are praised when we follow the rules and punished when we break them.
Have we ever taken the time to ask ourselves, who made these rules and whether they are there simply to keep us in line or whether these rules are there for our highest good?
Have we already started passing these rules on to the next generation because ‘that’s the way it’s done’ or are we willing to question them first?
Are we living consciously or by default? What does living consciously mean anyway? According to clinical psychologist, Dr Shefali Tsabary, who teaches conscious parenting, consciousness is a profound process.
“It is multi-layered and the ultimate level is the liberation of the self from all external identification. When the self is untethered to the opinions of others, to social status, to beauty, to age, to dogma, to religiosity, to any beliefs that limit and reduce it, then you are conscious,” Tsabary shared.
That is the ultimate and but to get there, we have to be willing to take the first step. Can we start by becoming aware of our thoughts, our reactions, our judgement when people are different from us – which ultimately is everyone?
Are we living as though we are separate from everyone else? If we are different, do we believe that we are right and they are wrong? That is living by default. As human beings, we want to belong – my family, my religion, my company, my country.
Then we feel separate from those outside our own family, religion, culture and country. It is us against them. We see this even when two people marry. My family and your family.
Living consciously begins with self-awareness. It can be a lonely journey because it’s easier to binge watch series or text people for hours on end. Those who choose to embark on the journey of living consciously are often condemned for their choices because it differs from the norm.
You are living your life from the inside out. What do I want to create? What do I believe? Can I be kinder? Can I be less judgmental? We don’t complain as much. We take full responsibility for everything in our lives. We no longer blame others for our life circumstances.
I know that may sound radical, but living consciously frees you from the confines that make you suffer and most of us don’t even know it. We are a generation that are more lonely, medicated, addicted and stressed than ever before. Perhaps it’s time for us to wake up and start asking the tough questions.
We are all here to learn and grow, to know ourselves in our divinity and wholeness. That part is not negotiable. What is negotiable is how you choose to come into that knowing.
If we are unconscious, life will throw us a series of challenges, each bigger than the last until we wake up to our own power and creativity. The easier way is to learn and grow consciously, by choice. Keep asking yourself, ‘How can I be the best version of myself?’
Now, more than ever, there are great teachers on our planet, to help people wake up and start living a conscious life. There are tons of books, audios, videos, talks, workshops and groups that are coming together to help humanity become more self-aware and conscious.
This is the only way for humanity to become kinder, more loving and more generous to each other. It is only when we can sit with and understand the source of our suffering that we can choose to change the rules that we have so far unconsciously followed.
Can we become more conscious in our relationships, in our work, within our families and the way we treat ourselves? When we can see that everyone speaks and acts from their own set of beliefs and experiences, we will understand their words and actions differently; but that can only happen when we start with ourselves.
People in pain often hurt other people – that is their unconscious default. They can only change and make amends when they choose to wake up, self-reflect and free themselves from the confines of limiting beliefs that are no longer serving us.
When we know that we are one, we will stop hurting each other and start an evolution of love and acceptance no matter how different we are from one another.
Kas Naidoo is a transformational coach and matchmaker. She can be contacted via email at [email protected]
