Breaking the silence – Men’s mental health takes centre stage this Movember

November brings a focus on men’s health, highlighting critical issues like prostate cancer, testicular cancer, and most importantly, mental health and suicide prevention.

Dr Shonitha Govender, a clinical psychologist, underscores the importance of addressing men’s mental health, particularly depression, anxiety, and the impact of societal expectations.

“This is the time to focus on men’s mental health, challenging the outdated belief that men should not show emotions,” she says. Dr Govender reflects on a common phrase, ‘Tigers don’t cry’, which captures society’s expectation that men should remain stoic in difficult situations. This mindset, she explains, has roots in generations past, fostering a culture where men avoid therapy and emotional vulnerability.

“In today’s world, where stressors are at an all-time high, therapy has become essential. We all face challenges, and a fresh perspective often helps us move forward,” Dr Govender added.

She commends the men who’ve taken steps toward mental well-being, breaking down barriers of vulnerability, and praises the women who support their partners in this journey.
Many men experience mental health struggles that remain hidden. Dr Govender highlights the prevalence of depression and anxiety, which often manifest through behaviours like anger or withdrawal.

Substance use disorders are also common, as men may turn to alcohol or drugs to cope with underlying emotional issues. Notably, men, especially older men, have a higher suicide rate compared to women – a result of undiagnosed or untreated depression and emotional distress.

“Stress, burnout, and expressions of anger often signal deeper emotional pain,” she says, revealing how these emotions are frequently misunderstood or overlooked.

The expectations around masculinity can make it difficult for men to seek help. Emotional suppression is often encouraged from a young age, with men feeling pressure to be self-reliant and resilient. Traditional ideals also link a man’s worth to his career and financial stability, creating additional anxiety when he faces economic challenges.

Dr Govender explains that men are frequently socialised to express stress through anger rather than healthy emotional expression, further complicating their mental health struggles.

The concept of toxic masculinity also hinders men’s willingness to seek support, reinforcing the belief that vulnerability is unmanly. Dr Govender says that men may feel that asking for help weakens their masculinity, leaving them fearful of judgment or ridicule. This culture of self-reliance can deter men from reaching out to therapy or mental health services, even when they are struggling.

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Men commonly hold misconceptions about therapy. Many believe it’s a sign of weakness or fear that therapists won’t understand them. Some perceive therapy as unproductive talking about feelings while others view medication as an admission of failure. These misconceptions, Dr Govender says, prevent men from realising the transformative impact therapy can have on their lives.

Hesitance to seek support is often rooted in a fear of vulnerability. Some men may not know how to express emotions in a healthy way, as emotional education has been largely absent from their upbringing. Additionally, men may worry about being a burden to their loved ones, which can discourage them from discussing their struggles. Opening up about mental health can feel risky, especially when men are conditioned to hide their emotions.

Dr Govender notes that men may have concerns when starting therapy, such as not being understood or fearing judgment. They may worry about wasting time if therapy doesn’t yield immediate solutions. The process of confronting long-held beliefs or difficult emotions can feel unsettling, but Dr Govender believes the benefits are worth it.

Several therapeutic approaches can make therapy more approachable for men. Practical, solution-focused approaches resonate well with those who seek concrete results. Therapies like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Solution-Focused Brief Therapy provide structure and actionable strategies. Alternative therapy formats, such as group therapy or outdoor therapy, may feel more comfortable and accessible. For some men, a strong therapeutic relationship built on trust and respect can make all the difference.

Family and friends play a crucial role in supporting men’s mental health. Offering non-judgmental support, normalising conversations about mental health, and modelling vulnerability can make it easier for men to open up. Dr Govender suggests that gently offering resources and checking in on loved ones can go a long way in creating a safe, supportive environment.

In recent years, there has been a shift toward openness around men’s mental health. Social media platforms, campaigns like Movember, and corporate wellness initiatives have contributed to greater awareness and accessibility. These efforts are helping to normalise conversations around mental health, making it easier for men to seek the support they need. Dr Govender believes this growing awareness marks a positive step forward in breaking down the stigma and encouraging men to prioritise their well-being.